Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Questioning your faith


I'm having a hard time with your death. It's not something that has encompassed every waking moment... we only knew each other breifly. Perhaps it is because life is such a beautiful thing. We can't wrap ourselves its enormity. Everyone gets to have some part of this experience. I guess its when I feel someone gets cheated--that I have a real problem with it. There is so much flagrent disregard floating in the wind, like a subtle plague. It spreads and screw a lot of things up. All we can do as people is rebel against the world that would turn us into callous, radical repiblical assholes with chips on our shouldiers.

So why would God take you? Surely it was not to remind me "how good I have it." Not some memorial in vain. I know what i have. You should have had more. Why would my God do this? I am not at rest.

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Strange Meetings

Recently, I have started a Facebook page which, not surprisingly, has turned more into a fetish. I'm sure that my fascination with it is based mostly on the novelty of finding people. I've done my best not to become one of those people who send out blind invitations to be "friends." Let's face it... if took you getting on Facebook to get back in touch with someone from your past, then chances are--they can't be THAT excited to hear from you. My point is... is that some of these people I just have a subtle curiosity about. I'm not going to lie to myself or to them that something "special" will be rekindled.

Then, there is always one person that seems to stick. Maybe its the immediate kinship you feel due to your shared experiences--or because you have unresolved feelings regarding that portion of your life--or because they're just plain awesome.

So you can guess that this is all leading to a particular experience or instance... oh it is. I've gotten back in contact with someone whom I have always had a great deal of respect and admiration for. The funny thing, is that they may not have known what kind of impact they had on me. It's very clear that some things remain guarded and I believe that to be very, very fair. I respect everyone's space and I think it is oh so groovy that they let me share my space (pardon the pun).

So, to my new old friend-- today I tip my glass to you. Thanks for being every bit as awesome as I always thought you were and would turn out to be. Perhaps in days without so much distance between us, we could all meet up, drink beers and tell war stories until we hours of the morning.

But until then...